Forty Duece

 The Baby Train

To Procreate or Not to Procreate… that is the Question

      I thought my wonderful and amazing Mom was bat shit crazy when she offered to freeze my eggs at 31 years old.  But when people say “I should have listened to my mother when I was younger,” they are usually right.  I was in no hurry to have children.  I always thought I would eventually push out a couple, but what’s the rush?  Age is not our friend in many ways, and this is pretty much the prime fucking example.  

     So now I am 42, and I may want kids, but I kind of feel the same I did about them when I was younger.  I am in no hurry.  Unfortunately there are not that many shopping days left until Christmas.  I started liking children a hell of a lot more once my nephews were born.  They are cool, they are my blood, and I have fun playing with them, but the struggle is real when it comes to the exhaustion that follows.  

     After you turn 40 your doctor makes you do tests every year; mammograms, blood work, ultrasounds.  That has turned up some positive and not so positive results on my possible overdue journey to popping a bun out of my oven.  I always thought I would be a fantastic mom.  I’m very loving, affectionate, giving and an excellent caretaker.  I do not want to regret not having a child, but strangely I’m not super worried about it either. 

     I am slightly confused, mostly because a lot of the people I know tell me having kids practically ruins your marriage, drains your bank account, you don’t get a good nights sleep for many years (I like my sleep and my boo is notorious for enjoying his), and your vagina is never the same.  Sounds amazing right?   These are the same people that are on my ass to have a baby, mind you.  On the other hand, with the exception of my man and my family, there is nothing on this earth I love more than my fur baby Maximus.  Someone once told me “imagine loving Maximus 100 times more than you already do and that’s the love you will feel for your child.”  Sounds kinda cool.  Yet you see how one could be perplexed on this grand life decision that you can never reverse.  

     The main tragedy of not procreating, for me personally, is I wouldn’t be able to pass on my boyfriend’s baby genes.  He was by far the cutest child to ever grace this earth with his adorable presence.  No lie.    I’m sure the creation of the cutest baby ever may not even be a concern at my tender age of 42, considering at 35+ your pregnancy is considered geriatric (which is a word defined as an elderly person).  **side note- Thank you to the dickhead guy who coined THAT medical term, you know a woman did not come up with that. 

     So we leave it up to chance.  If it happens, it happens.  If I have the opportunity to adopt that would be cool too.  If I am meant to live this life being “only” a fur Mom, that may work out being just fine as well. 

     And…Cheers to all the baby makers out there!  Childbirth looks absolutely terrifying, but that’s a whole other blog post.

January 10, 2018


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